It’s funny, sometimes in life it seems that nobody could possibly hurt us more than ourselves. We truly can be our own worst enemy. Sabotaging all the good things in our lives with all kinds self destructive behaviors .Sometimes it’s because we don’t know how to 1st, love God, and 2nd, how to love ourselves. Also because we often have no concept of God’s massive love for us. We can end up with so much anger, pride, unforgiveness, bitterness, jealousy, ect.
When this happens we hurt not only ourselves but the people we love…it’s inevitable, I suppose. Often we will transfer how lousy we feel about ourselves onto other people. Picking fights with them, tearing them down in whatever way we can. All because we are so angry at the person staring back at us in the mirror.
But the good news is, you don’t have to live in tyranny to that person …to yourself anymore. With the love and power of God, you can confront that enemy without fear. You don’t have to confront those dark, scary places of your soul by yourself, he will go there with you.
In that place, where dark finally meets the light, you can find healing. You can be redeemed, healed, forgiven, delivered, and restored. Praise God for 2nd and 3rd and 4th chances… Praise God we do not have to be enslaved to ourselves.
Below is a little something I wrote about this subject a while back….
How is it that we our own worst enemy? Robbing us of all that we are supposed to have, killing all of who we are supposed to be. It's like we are shadow boxers wrestling with an invisible enemy. I fight off no one but an apparition that somehow looks a little too much like me.
We claim to hate our brother. Angry because we feel like we deserve more than what we're getting. We pick fights with one another and kill the innocent with our biting, cold as hell words. So maybe tonight after the battle is over, we just might finally have ourselves convinced that this is it, there within this tyranny is our only happiness.
So I breathe a settle sigh of relief, for one more night I am appeased to fool myself to believe that it's them I really hate. But truthfully, it's the enemy in the mirror I see so painfully staring back at me....
Laying all the cards out on the table, time to deal with this self conflicted complication. I think it's time for a confrontation...
I hate you. I can't forgive you. You are ugly. You are a stupid fool. You are unloved and unlikable. You've made too many mistakes and buddy, there's just no redemption for you. There's no hope for your cracked and broken soul. There's no where else for you to go. You are worthless and will never be anything more. The end. My dear the story's over and the book is closed.
"No!", I hear myself scream. Do not tell me the book is closed! I no longer want the conclusion that I have chose. This can't really be the final word, this can't be the final page. Is a period at the end of a damning sentence all that remains? In spite of all these things, I wish for more words. I wish for more than a self inflicted curse. Jesus, oh Jesus am I more than this? Tell me there is redemption for all of my sins....
I see a new light for your soul and this story is far from over. My child, you are beautiful. You may not forgive yourself but just know, I forgave you 2000 years ago. You are not too far gone, my love, you will never be. If you could even for a second comprehend, if you could only see the deep love I have for you, you would never be the same again. Deeper than the deepest oceans, higher the sky seems to reach. Hope abounds in my arms, you will find me if you only seek. Redemption is just an arms length away. Let my love quiet your crying today. Come to me when your heart is breaking and your soul is dying. Call out my name. I am always here, I am always the same. You, love, are more precious than gold, oh the worth of your being you'll never know. Die to yourself and come live for me. There is freedom from your self, freedom from your tyranny. You see, on the cross I eternally conquered your worst enemy.
(C) Krystal Celeste